Migrain!

Masih pusing..
duh.. amit2!
mual sih udah ga... cuma MIGREN-nya yg makin jadi!

hmm...
Bil, kemaren aku cerita ke kamu soal obsesiku...
I think you have to know..

Tembakau: Berbahaya Dalam Bentuk dan Samaran Apapun

Sehubungan dengan peringatan Hari Tanpa Tembakau Sedunia 2006
yang jatuh pada tanggal 31 Mei 2006, maka kami, penulis blog
yang peduli dengan masalah ini, bermaksud untuk memperingatkan
kita semua akan bahaya tembakau:

1. Memperingatkan kita semua bahwa tembakau BERBAHAYA DALAM
BENTUK APAPUN. Rokok, rokok pipa, bidi, kretek, rokok
beraroma cengkeh, snus, snuff, rokok tanpa asap, cerutu...
semuanya berbahaya.

2. Memperingatkan kita semua bahwa tembakau dalam jenis, nama
dan rasa apapun sama bahayanya. Tembakau BERBAHAYA DALAM
SAMARAN APAPUN. Mild, light, low tar, full flavor, fruit
flavored, chocolate flavored, natural, additive-free, organic
cigarette, PREPS (Potentially Reduced-Exposure Products),
harm-reduced... semuanya berbahaya. Label-label tersebut
TIDAK menunjukkan bahwa produk-produk yang dimaksud lebih aman
dibandingkan produk lain tanpa label-label tersebut.

3. Menuntut Pemerintah Republik Indonesia untuk sesegera
mungkin meratifikasi WHO Framework Convention on Tobacco
Control (WHO FCTC) demi kesehatan penerus bangsa. Indonesia
adalah satu-satunya negara di Asia yang belum menandatangani
perjanjian Internasional ini.

Internet, 31 Mei 2006

Tertanda,

Trinie Lupin

Sakit

Hari ini ga ngantor.
pusing, mual.
Abis sarapan, bobo lagi
Bangun, makan siang, makan obat, terus ol.
gila! mabok berat! liat email ada 700-an! semua account totalnya 1000-an!
amit-amit!!! Tambah mabok dah!

ya udah lah..
jam 9.30 euy...
Setengah jam lagi tidur!
masih pusing...

:( EMAIL GUE! GIMANA NGEJARNYA????

Ultah Grannies!

Ke Bdo hari Rabu, tgl 24 Malem.
tgl 25, seharian di Mess Ktr... TIDUR, Makan dan Nonton!
tgl 26, ke rumah Nini, ngumpul lagi sama adek2ku sayang... hehehehe... gangguin mpe marah... :P dan Arisan!! Yang dapet Raffi!
tgl 27, jam 11, kita mulai acaranya. Aku sesekali jagain adek2ku.
malem pulang ke Jkt, rencana ol batal gr2 kabelvision in trouble lagi.

=============

Hehehe... sorry, lagi flu nih.. pengen ceritain tgl 27 itu. jadi males ngapa2in.
terus ... Gempa di Ygy tuh... :(
WISH YOU ARE OK, DEAR DAVE!
The others have confirmed that they are ok by sms.

And... Andi De La Rocha! Thx for your message "Sempet2nya ol nih buat Nie" di YM :) *he is the only one who call me "Nie"*

Thx God You are all fine, Aufi, Pippin, Ika, Niki, Andi, Andie... tinggal Dave dan Prass yg blm ngirim kabar.

Drained

Kemaren tuh bener2 hiperaktif! Bener2 ga bisa diem deh! Dari pagi lho, full of energy!
Di ktr, bolak balik buka tutup laci, cuma ngeliatin isinya doang! (what was I doing??? *blush*).
terus, duduk jg... AIH! Bener2 ga betah diem sama sekali!

Chatting sm Edo & Winda, ngobrol2, pengen deh nonton DVC. Aku ngomongin itu, trus aku ajak tuh... Edo dan Winda bilang mau. Sip... tinggal nentuin waktu nih!
Bingung juga nih, aku dan winda pengen hari sabtu, tapi edo dan nabil so pasti milih tidur nih..
Ah.. nanti diarrange lagi ya say..

Jam 5, Bu Iis dan Teh Atiek pamit pulang, aku tinggal di ktr mpe jam 7 :D terus ke Daeng Tata, dianter Iman. Mpe di sana, udah ada Azil, Om Andika, Ela, Vinley, Adis, terus Eko.
Aku pesen Nasi Goreng lagi dan Fresh Tea. Duh, Pengen jg sih Ribs-nya... tapi gimana motongnya? kan malu kalo tiba2 ribsnya punya kaki, alias loncat dari piring pas lagi dipotong.. Aku minta ke Adis sepotong aja deh... Thx ya Dis.
Abis makan, ngobrol deh... Sewaktu ngobrol itu, aku bener2 ga bs diem bgt!!! IGH! Sial bgt!
tempat sampah yg di bawah meja, ketendang terus.. tutup gelas kesenggol terus... ambil tissue di dlm tas, tissue-nya jatoh melulu! DSB DSB kejadian yg nyebeliinnn bgt!
Terus Eko pamit pulang duluan.
Ga lama, dateng 2 orang ngelirik-lirik, terus salah satunya : "mbak Lupin ya?" aku disalamin sama dia. Aku bengong abis! Siapa ni orang? kok baru pertama liat, lgsg tau aku? anak2 yang lain pada nanyain ke aku : "siapa tuh? siapa sih?" aku cuma bisa angkat bahu dan jawab : "Ga tau".
Komentar Om Andika : "Diem2, ternyata Trinie terkenal juga nih!"
HAYAH!! Maluuuuuuuuuuuuuu deh!!!!
terus dateng Indra dan Ella.
Usut punya usut, ternyata yg dateng Godsoul dan Mimin! Mereka yg postingannya di Gajah garing bgt mpe disebelin sama semua orang, bahkan ada beberapa yg terang2an memfilter postingan mereka! Ga heran juga sih, kalo disebelin.. Gaya candaan mereka berbeda dengan anak2 lainnya. Alhasil, kemaren di DT tuh, Mimin basi sendiri, ga bisa ngikutin omongan kita. Diem aja deh tuh... hihihihihi... kasian juga sih... tapi mau gimana lagi?

Pulang jam 9, di jln, aku dpt sms dr Nabil, nanyain udah pulang blm "dtg2 terus tidur!".
Dtg2, cuci muka, cuci kaki, ganti baju, terus nyalain kompie.. Mau ngisi blog.
huah, kompie masih blm bisa konek internet! Kayaknya sejak ada update-an baru dr MS-nya tuh... alhasil, ZA ga jalan (truevector-nya bentrok kali, ga mau ngeload), kompie jd LAMBAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTT BGT!

Masih full of adrenaline, aku ikut nonton aja, sembari balesin sms Edo, Nie dan Nabil.
Dan sms Hadi! duh, Hadi! kalo mau dtg tuh, yaaa... sms dong waktu sebelum jln dr ktr! aku kan taro hp-ku di atas meja di kamarku, sementara aku nonton di ruang tv! Duh! Daasarrrrrr... Kamu itu yaaa....
Udah gitu, kamu bawa kaos yg salah pula! aku kan pesen ke kamu, 2 kaos DE ukuran M! kok yg dtg, 1 kaos ukuran S??? *PENTUNG HADI!*

Ngantuk sih ngantuk, tapi masih aktif bgt... sampe2 jam 12 tuh kerjaan bolak-balik doang di ranjang!
Sampe akhirnya jam 1 lbh, aku sms Nie, ngomong kalo aku ga bisa tidur... abis itu? baru bisa tidur deh! (hehehehehe.. You are my Sleeping pills, Sweetheart! :-* )
================

Gr2 itu, sekarang nih drained! walaupun masih hiperaktif, happy karena kemaren, I'm drained.
ditambah lagi abis makan nih... halah... NGANTUKKKKKKKK!!!

huhuhuhuhuhu... disuruh Dad masukin data dr kompie ke Nokia Comunicatornya! IGH! bener2 GA ENAK BGT DEH! Tombolnya itu lho! terpaksa aku ngetik 11 jari! jadi LAMAAAAAAAAA BGT!
Duh, My DEAR DADDDYYYY.. Next time, pls.. dont ask me to type on your Comunicator again...
I'm NOT THAT PATIENT!

sigh...

how come?
how come it always be me?
who suffering for someone's mistake?
not that I'm sighing,
but sometime it's too much.

one day,
you must walk alone again without me.
because I wont be there to accompany you
I wont be there to catch you from falling.
when it happen,
I want you to prepare yourself, Dear...
YOU MUST!

bleh...

Ah.. Home...
"Honey, I'm home..."
"...."
*BANG!*
he was killed by his wife because he brought someone to their bed.
=======
just writing when there's no words to say.

Au!

Au.. kemaren mati listrik...
Pdhl aku lagi ngobrol sama Herda dan mau posting puisiku.
Sms-an ama Edo, ktnya "kabarnya ada gardu yg meledak."
halah, bakal nyala pagi2 ini sih!
*grumbles*

my cam! my cam is showing green and black pics!
What's up??? the last time I used it, it was fine.
and... I forgot not to do something that I have to do!

Gees... those newbies...
they are killing me with their Not-Funny-Jokes!
I'M GOING TO KICK THEIR *SS TO HELL!
(filtered to trash, for those two!)

HORE!

Mimisan pagi2... huh, selama darah yg kental belum keluar, ga akan sembuh nih...

Aku baru pulang dr rmh Teteh di tanjung mas, hp ga dibawa karena sedang dicharge (penting gitu ditulis di sini? :P ).
Di sana, aku main sama adek2ku dan ponakan2ku yang masih bayi.
hihihihi... seperti biasa, kita yg gede2 gangguin yang masih kecil2 dan juga sebaliknya, yang lbh kecil gangguin yg lbh gede.

Aduh, Dodan(3) lemparin pasir ke Raffie(2,5), masukin pasir ke dlm bajunya. sampe masuk jg ke celananya lho! Terus Raffie kita bersihin, ganti baju dan celana, eh, Dodan malah ngelemparin pasir lagi, kali ini kena mukanya. Raffie tereak2 deh, kemasukan pasir tuh mata dan mulutnya!
Dodan sayang, kok kamu jd gitu sih? dulu2 ga pernah ngelawan aku... kalo dibilang udah, ya udah. sekarang kok sengaja ngelawan gitu?
Akhirnya Raffie ga kita ijinin main sama Dodan selama Dodan masih main pasir di kebon belakang.

Terus hihihihi... aku... hmm... ditanyain soal pacar sama para ibu, "Teh, pacarnya mana nih?" "Teh, pacar kok ga diajak?"
Dibilangin aku blm punya pacar, kok ga percaya sih, Ibu?? Ya udah, aku bilang aja lagi PeDeKaTe. hihihihihii.... :P Ada juga sobat cowok, kok Bu...
"Yah? Ga asyik bgt... cowok kok dijadiin sobat doang? kenapa ga sekalian jadi pacar aja?" sambil bergaya, ngegodain.
Hayah Ibuuuuuuuuuuu...!!!! Bu, Bu, kan kl sobat lbh awet drpd pacar, bu... drpd pacar, mending sekalian aja nikah deh, Bu.. pacarannya nanti kl udah nikah aja deh... :">
Eh, Bu, Bu.. suruh dia aja duluan nikah tuh (sembari nunjuk my sis), dia kan udah pacaran tuh..
My sis yg ngerasa diomongin lgsg melotot.. "APA?" hihihihihihi.... ga kok say...
*kabur*

Gempa?

td siang, anak2 pada laporan : "GEMPA!", sementara aku ga ngerasa tuh ada gempa.
anak2 milis Gajah yang lagi arisan (conference, huh coba YM-ku bisa sign in...), pada live report!

nyem..
pulkan, bobo!

jd sekarang malah seger..
ditambah lagi full moon...
AIH! so beautiful!!!

:( :( :( :( :(
SMS AKU DONG....
PLS..
I'm feeling lonely without your sms :(
I mean it!
Seharian ga ada yg sms, felt like being Forgotten!

what a day!

Aku perhatiin kalo maag-ku sakit tuh tiap habis makan.
Bener ada luka kali nih...
Nanti nodong Mom ke dokter ah!

Aku ngantuk euy...
Pengen pulang :D
Enak TIDUR!

Btw, kok aku ga bisa ngobrol santai dengan dia ya?
Padahal mau dong ngobrol santai, saling ledek, biar bisa lebih kenal deket.
Sebel deh liat dia ngobrol santai bgt sama yg lain tapi tidak denganku.

KONEKSI HANCUR!
Ga bisa buka gmail :((
Alamat bakal full deh!

Huah!

Yaiks!

Mimisan? Ah biasaaa...
Bleh, shouldnt tell him about this...
tapi udah kelepasan, and he sent me his worriness vibration!
Hmm... Cant lie to him as he cant lie to me, because both of us know when we lie to each other.

Hihihihi.. He was sending me this funny sms :

"Try to sleep for me, kay? and kalo udah tidur, sms me ya!"

So I didnt.
And in the morning, he complained to me via YM "Td malem kok ga sms gue? gue kan udah bilang kalo mau tidur, sms gue dulu."
I simply answer : "HOW? kan kamu nulisnya 'KALO UDAH tidur, sms gue ya!' lah? bagaimana mau sms kamu? dari mimpi?"
And he just laughed.

Dodol kan?

=======================

On Saturday, My Dearest Daddy fell in the bathroom and had his leg "keseleo".
Yesterday, when he came back from Bdo, he'd had got his leg warped and walking with the help of a walking stick.
Everytime I get near him, I can feel his pain (luckily I feel only a little).
I know it's not good but I'm trying not to get close to him, So I stay in my room, sitting on my chair and try not to think about it.

========================

Pengen pulang....
Hujan gini, enak tidur ya...

HELP ME!

I HAVE NEVER BEEN LIKE THIS BEFORE!

Feel like crazy!
I can smile at nothing
I can laugh at something that is not funny
I can .... LOADS of WEIRD THINGS!

Nabil asked me something weird! "Lo lagi jatuh cinta? I can sense it so much!"
HA? aku bener2 bengong!
Gue? jatuh cinta?
AIH! masa sih???
AH! Yang BENER???

aku jawab, "Ga kok!"
"pin, lo ga bs boongin gue, gue tau lo boong"
lho? jd yang aku rasain sekarang ini adalah itu?
HA? AMPUN! hihihihihihi..
(halah, ketawa melulu!)
aku cuma bisa kasih icon :">
Segitu kencangnya-kah hingga terasa banget olehmu, bil??

terus Nabil nanya2 lagi soal dia.
Percakapan selanjutnya, biarlah cuma aku, Nie, Nabil dan Edo yang tau!
Ga ada rahasia antara aku dan tiga orang ini.


Aku nulis begini aja udah senyum2, ngikik sendiri!
AIH! HELP ME!!!!!

Ngaco!

pengen bgt nulis
tapi ga tau nulis apaan

yg muncul di kepala, puisi yg ngaco abis :

Maafkan diriku
Yang telah lancang mencintaimu
Yang telah lancang merindukanmu
Yang telah lancang memimpikanmu
Yang telah lancang menodai rasa sayangmu

Biar kupergi
tinggalkanmu sendiri
Biarkan aku sendiri lagi

Tak ingin kulukai lagi hatimu
Tak ingin kulukai lagi dirimu
Tak ingin kuhancurkan lagi harga dirimu

Kau terlalu berharga untuk kugenggam
terlalu berharga untuk kuraih
terlalu cantik untuk kupajang
terlalu indah untuk kutatap

Dan aku di sini berharap kau bahagia.

SICK

HAYAH!
Sakit lagi! hehehehehe... HANCUR!
Sariawan banyak, tenggorokan bengkak, maagku kambuh, perut ga beres, pusing, tulang sakit2, badan agak hangat. Ga bisa makan, cuma masuk sedikit, jd masuk angin.. plus diare pula.
HALAH! SEABREG! Udah ada seminggu aku begini.. semua orang bilang "kok kurusan sih?"
Mau flu? iya kali, tapi kok ga ada bersin dan batuk ya? atau ini yg namanya Flu Perut?
Awalnya sih ga bs makan doang tuh! cuma bisa masuk 2-3 suap doang. terus berlanjut ke sakit yg lain.
(heran, udah ga bisa makan, pake diare. apanya yg mau dikeluarin ya?)

It's been hard confusing months for me. As my senses getting weird enough, and all those painfully experiences, tiring me a lots. I have never been like this before!
I mean Not that of illnesses, because I am more than use to it. It's my life we're talking about, getting sick is fine for me. I take drugs as I take candies, even more : I shallow my pills without water! a bit warning/BE ADVICE : NOT RECOMMENDED! as pills need water to disolve! (I always drink water after those pills shallowed)

================

Hmm... Ada yg nanya soal kedekatanku dengan Allah SWT hanya karena aku tak pernah menyebut2 namaNya di blog ini.
Jawabanku simpel saja : It is too personal. Aku GA AKAN PERNAH menulis soal itu, buat apa? buat dipuji2 "rajin beribadah"? "rajin berdoa"? "rajin bersyukur"? atau "rajin beramal"?
Hehehe.. NO THX! Biarlah hanya DIA dan aku yg tau. Kalian ga perlu tau dan GA AKAN pernah tau! Lagipula kalo aku menuliskan hal itu hanya supaya kalian tau, kalian puji2, apa bukan RIYA' namanya?
(duh, jadi ceramah deh!)
So... No, I'LL NEVER WRITE AGAIN ABOUT THIS! N E V E R!

3 hari di BDO

Pergi Ke Bdo hari jumat pagi, lgsg ke B6. ngobrol2 sebentar terus ke Scorpio.
Asyik ada Phie di sana, aku curhat sama Phie soal macem2. Sayang cuma sebentar euy..
Kalo tau Mom dan Bu Yun bakal ke t4 itu, aku tinggal dulu aja di Scorpio!
GA PUAS!!!
Next time, I'm going to stay @ your home, We'll talk about everything!

Hari sabtu siang, ke B6 lagi. Tdnya mau bantu2 ngeberesin... eh, dtg2 udah pada siap, tinggal tunggu tamu2 dateng. Nonton bareng2 sodara2ku deh.
terus ada Kang Ade dtg. Teh Ila, Nina, Mang Eme (huh, satu keluarga cengeng amat! dipijit gitu aja tereak2!), de el el dipijit satu2.
Pas giliranku, disuruh pindah di kamar deh, Soalnya tamunya udah dateng.
Kang Ade mijit kakiku sambil ngomong : "udah lama ya ga dipijit? 5 tahun lho" (hehehehe.. tau aja!), "Kepalamu sering pusing nih", "perut ga beres tuh" (hayah, kl ini sih udah tau, kang... "Aku emang lagi susah makan nih.."), "kamu kuat euy!"(hehehehe.. emangnya yg lain ga ada yg TIDAK tereak2 ya, kang?).
Sakit sih sakit kang.. tapi masih ketahan kok. Cuma segini doang mah masih ketahan nih. Tapi kang, yang dipijit sakitnya kerasa terus nih sampe sekarang! "3 hari (sakitnya)" kt Mom. hihihihi..

Minggu Pagi2, pas bersin2, mimisan. hehehehe... mimisan yg diem di dlm pula (bakal lama sembuh nih). trus mandi, makan, terus sembari nunggu Parents nonton Oprah.
Berangkat ke Jkt, lgsg ke Pejaten, Ultah sepupuku 3 orang di sana.

Hihihihi.. Nabil... Nabil... I can sense it for days! U miss me that much, eh? Sampe2 sms "OTW"-ku lgsg dibales : "Tar gue ke rmh lo yah!!" Tapi dtg2, lemes bgtttt.. deh! baru bangun tidur ya? ditambah flu pula :P
Jadinya aku ngobrol sama Edo doang. hehehehe... Do, aku baru tau kalo kamu asma jg, tapi beda pencetus ya..
LHO??? TAPI?? YAH??? Ga bs ikut aku dong nanti ke NL??? td ujan aja yg menurutku panas bgt, Edo pake Jaket.. :(
Do, sorry td aku bales smsmu : "Kok Bolu? itu Brownies" ROTFL! >:)
Bil. bagus jg kamu kumisan gitu, hihihihi....

Sekarang maag-ku keluar juga sakitnya, setelah kemaren2 ulahnya cuma kenyang2 waktu jam makan. Masih blm bisa makan sih, tapi lumayan deh!
Mpe selesai nulis ini, masih sakit aja! (I hope You dont feel it, Bil!)

============================================================

Dapet email : "Which Baby Are You?" dan aku cuma ambil yg ini...

---------------JANUARY BABY--------------------
pretty/handsome. Loves to dress up. Easily bored.
Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to
recover when hurt. Sensitive. Down-to-Earth.
Stubborn.
----------------------------------------------------

Hmm... ga semuanya bener deh...
Yg ini bener : Easily Bored, Fussy, Takes time to recover when hurt, Sensitive, Down-to-earth, Stubborn.
tapi yg lainnya salah bgt.. :P

Ga beres sekaleee...

Setelah ga bisa makan, gantinya Diare.
ih, amit2...
===============

Hihihihihi...
Saat ini ada seseorang yg sedang tersipu2 di balik monitor, setelah aku godain abis2an!
hihihihi... marah dia, tapi udah pasti tersipu2...
Dont worry, Honey, He LIKES you! And so do YOU!

===============

Td malem jam 10.25, Hadi dtg ke rumah, mau pinjem buku.
Hehehe... mau buka garasinya, udah digembok. pdhl aku udah pesen sama Bibi, "jgn digembok dulu, ada temenku mau dtg."

Setelah masukin motornya, kita ngobrol2...
and guess what?? Time's Flying SO FAST, sampe2 Mom ngasih tanda pake lasernya dr lt atas.
liat jam... OMIGOD! jam 12!!!
Gees.. Where's time gone? ONE AND A HALF HOURS we've talked about everything!
Dia buru2 pulang deh... and guess what again? dia bukannya pulang dulu, malah mampir di warnet! nyambung lagi ngobrol di YM, walaupun cuma sebentar.
Hihihihihi...

Sementara Bil yang sms-nya aku bales waktu abis makan, lgsg ke ktr buat ol di ym.
dia ngebuzz waktu aku masih di bawah, lagi ngobrol sama Hadi.
I told him on sms about Hadi would coming on 10 PM, and his reaction : "MALEM GINI???"
And... while we talked about my actions on him these days, he made me confuse. Really confuse...

Did he really speak from his heart? or rather from his ego? bcoz I know he has a HUGE Ego like a 5 years old child. Sometimes I felt him being honest, but mostly it's his ego who's speaking.

Almost all my friends told me, "U better leave him, becoz it's not worth to have a friend who make U ill... But it's not U, U are simply too kind to do that, I mean leaving him behind."

So I've decided to give him one more chance.
If he cant, then I will truly leave him, eventhough it means I broke my promise to myself long ago that I WILL NEVER LEAVE ANYBODY unless ASKED to leave.

You know what? IT HURTS ME MORE THAN IT HURTS YOU!

Confusions

Hihihi... what a title, eh? But I am confuse.

What's up with me?
My body and my sense've been acting very weird these days...
Cant trust my brain and senses, for they're deceiving me!

Yesterday I had to make a letter to a customer, I did it WRONGLY for FOUR TIMES!
Today I wrote letters for three customers and I have to recorrected each of them for FOUR TIMES (too)! SO I MADE TWELVE MISTAKES OVER AND OVER AGAIN!

GEES!!! NIEEEEEEEEEE................. U MUST HELP MEEEEEEEE..............

Cant Sleep

Shaking..
Been thinking of drinking painkiller drugs to ease the pain away.
Cant stand it for my body is very weird these days.
Pain comes almost all the time from outside and inside.
I'm shaking now.
curling on my bed and shaking hard..
Mom & Dad dont know this because tonight they are not @ home.

U see... I'm not that Strong.. I'm crying for nothing AT ALL now.

Sara Freder

Ada e-mail yg rutin bgt masuk ke inbox-ku, udah 2 tahun kali ada.
waktu awal2, sara ini bener2 ngebujuk2... pake hadiah, pake ngomong gratis... tapi pas di klik formulir-nya, ternyata tetep harus bayar tuh!

Belakangan ini, masih berusaha "membantu" tapi udah ga nyodorin hadiah atau gratisan..
aku perhatiin dia tau aku ada sense, dia tau aku astral, tapi utk ramalannya, ga ada yg bener deh...

Ini yg aku dpt dr emailnya baru2 ini :

You will come to understand why I had to take action for you without even asking for your approval… Had I not immediately acted with all the strength of my occult forces to neutralize the negative vibrations of your Astral Environment, at the time when you are reading these lines, you would definitely have "missed" this opportunity, without even getting to know this genuine money luck opportunity that was about to change your existence.

You know, Trinie, that you are a unique being, unlike anyone else. You are a unique person and because of this, you need a very specific kind of help to solve your every problem, a kind of help specifically tuned to your personality. You need a particular personal help unlike any other.

While I know your problems and I am ready to solve them with maximum efficiency, these problems are very different from anyone else’s, even someone very close to you. Your personality and the problems you’ve encountered so far make you a unique case - which is why I take an extremely personal approach to everyone who requests my help.

The help I am offering you is so unique, so adapted to your personal case and your personality, that I can hardly work for several people at the same time. I had to tell you this because I wouldn’t want you to imagine that the help I am offering you today is the same help I am offering to everyone else who comes up to me. I want you to know that I have involved myself personally in your case and the solution I am offering to you today is one that I have personally chosen for you, the best suited to deal with your problems and to give you this happy and thrilling life you are entitled to hope for, and which is going to be yours.

This is the lastest one :

In the weeks to come, spectacular changes are going to turn your whole life around. I therefore must advise extreme caution because it would be dangerous to ignore this warning of destiny.

This is why, without waiting for your permission, I have attempted to find out more and therefore I performed for you, Trinie a string of Mystical Beneficial Occult Aid Ceremonials.

I must take very substantial risks if I am to continue. But I am willing to accept them because I want to save you from the traps you could fall into if you do nothing about the decisive mysterious events shaping up ahead of you.

I have perceived that this negative event occurred on the day of your 13th birthday. I don’t know whether you can recall it. You were among your family and you thought everyone was your friend. One of those people, jealous at you and your family, acted very rashly and inflicted a very deep wound on your soul. However, at the time, you tried to forget the incident and put it behind you. But it never went away; it left a deep imprint in your memory and it is very likely one of the main reasons behind your problems today!

Indeed, since your 13th birthday your personality has changed. Today you are a different person than before that evil incident. Anxiety has taken the upper hand in your soul, once filled with energy and joy. Your passionate nature, your immense sensitivity have been impounding on your relationships with the others. Some people know your weak points all too well, they often use them and sometimes abuse them.

Moreover, today I sense that you are even more vulnerable and isolated from everyone. I perceive a high level of stress and a lot of apathy. You are filled with doubts and you are convinced you will never find a way out.

All these negative thoughts are your worst enemies, as they quietly maintain this unhealthy climate that is corroding your existence minute after minute and chokes one after another your every chance of success.

Well, as to 2nd one... That open my old wounds... the wounds I keep trying to ease...
That 13th birthday... Yes I remember it clearly enough.. I have it as my secret, my only secret from all of you, I didnt tell anyone about it but my parents only. It happened TWICE!! by him and the other one!
Gees... that occasions... has made me ... a different person, I didnt realize it on that moment.

It had happened again when I was in college by different person. it has made me hysterical everytime she standing near me (Until NOW!). Unfortunately... my parents insisted on me to stay close to her, the reason is because she is eldest person in my daddy's line of family, "that means you should respect her!"

YEAH SURE! SORRY MOM, SORRY DAD! I HAVE LOST MY RESPECT TO HER EVERSINCE SHE DID IT TO ME! And she did it TWICE!! TWICE IS MORE THAN ENOUGH!!!

And as to the last two paragraphs, I must admit it's true... "Isolated", "Apathy", "Fill with doubt", Pesimistic, am I? But, can U blame me for that? For I had it happened for FOUR TIMES!

Do, If U read this... U must understand that my action this morning, when we were chatting about Bil, is my way to protect me from all that. I was trying to isolate pains from my heart, my body, my sense.
Forgive me, Bil, because I dont want to get hurt anymore.
U see, Nanda, your theory of me being a broken winged eagle is right.

U can see the full letters of her in here and here

I'm trying to findout the sollution of my sensing problems. I need your help, because my parents, the ones who supposed to understand me fully and find me the sollutions, are CLEARLY NOT ABLE to help me.